How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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