Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
