I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
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