This is not my ceiling
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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