haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
