Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10