in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
