We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
