I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.