okay pat passed out under dana's car
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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