that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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