3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize