I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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