its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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