The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize