the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
