called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
