The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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