i don't like sucking hair
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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