For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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