Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
The feeling are messing with the penis
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
