Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize