Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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