yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
