i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
