yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
