i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
