somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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