My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
