Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol

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  (914): ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol http://tfl.nu/wxs2
  Replies (14) Good night (3958) Bad night (621)
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  (646): View more from New York

  I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night

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  (646): I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night http://tfl.nu/kb2l
  Replies (5) Good night (4146) Bad night (788)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.

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  (386): Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately. http://tfl.nu/dyb2
  Replies (17) Good night (896) Bad night (6270)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.

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  (778): I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm. http://tfl.nu/ttig
  Replies (6) Good night (861) Bad night (3349)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends

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  (847): u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends http://tfl.nu/ywa9
  Replies (14) Good night (4317) Bad night (1912)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.

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  (724): It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me. http://tfl.nu/9spl
  Replies (7) Good night (3778) Bad night (737)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"

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  (401): You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car" http://tfl.nu/0yb1
  Replies (7) Good night (2448) Bad night (1019)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye

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  (781): No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye http://tfl.nu/qnov
  Replies (12) Good night (1087) Bad night (2766)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.

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  (204): You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/qhl9
  Replies (3) Good night (1642) Bad night (911)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.

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  (501): Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend. http://tfl.nu/du0y
  Replies (7) Good night (3125) Bad night (559)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.

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  (253): Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad. http://tfl.nu/4hs3
  Replies (13) Good night (640) Bad night (1626)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines

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  (901): Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines http://tfl.nu/paji
  Replies (10) Good night (692) Bad night (313)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.

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  (440): literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck. http://tfl.nu/514p
  Replies (1) Good night (529) Bad night (351)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.

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  (850): So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this. http://tfl.nu/uwka
  Replies (10) Good night (616) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.

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  (216): I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week. http://tfl.nu/slhb
  Replies (3) Good night (237) Bad night (486)

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