Texts From Last Night

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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick

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  (401): he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick http://tfl.nu/778x
  Replies (69) Good night (14582) Bad night (3827)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.

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  (850): I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over. http://tfl.nu/m507
  Replies (118) Good night (5799) Bad night (6068)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I forgot about that,good spring break.

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  (703): then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild" (773): I forgot about that,good spring break. http://tfl.nu/09xy
  Replies (16) Good night (6200) Bad night (1297)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.

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  (407): Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine. http://tfl.nu/l8j9
  Replies (19) Good night (1345) Bad night (2837)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?

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  (847): Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off? http://tfl.nu/erc6
  Replies (12) Good night (2595) Bad night (951)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.

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  (203): I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight. http://tfl.nu/nwmv
  Replies (6) Good night (1072) Bad night (1504)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....

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  (850): No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status..... http://tfl.nu/5hnt
  Replies (9) Good night (2874) Bad night (1150)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.

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  (978): Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus. http://tfl.nu/c88k
  Replies (9) Good night (3048) Bad night (584)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.

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  (412): So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on. http://tfl.nu/mz2g
  Replies (6) Good night (1093) Bad night (648)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"

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  (937): She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!" http://tfl.nu/x0ik
  Replies (3) Good night (755) Bad night (407)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.

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  (303): Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash. http://tfl.nu/958z
  Replies (5) Good night (766) Bad night (278)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby

  (1+61): View more from

  Yah. Thai people are way too trusting

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  (+61): It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby (1+61): Yah. Thai people are way too trusting http://tfl.nu/j4hl
  Replies (1) Good night (700) Bad night (411)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.

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  (410): She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue. http://tfl.nu/xn2n
  Replies (4) Good night (1120) Bad night (252)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?

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  (813): Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating? http://tfl.nu/e7er
  Replies (2) Good night (517) Bad night (289)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,

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  (479): I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women.., http://tfl.nu/6j57
  Replies (6) Good night (778) Bad night (262)

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