How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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