summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
