you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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