In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize