i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
