Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
