Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
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