you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
