This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
