all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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