I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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