We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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