I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
COCAINE IS GR8
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
