I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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