I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
