the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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