I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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