I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize