I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
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i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
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EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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