don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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