Kiss
Puke
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
