isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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